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Do self help books actually help?
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October 08, 2009 04:45 AM
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They can. I think just like with any of the 'psychologies', you get out of it what you're willing to put into it and take from it.
Self-help books can help someone who is willing to take what they offer and put them into use in their own lives.
But I have seen some quack self-help books though. Self-published books by people with no credentials, books by people who have off the wall theories about things that aren't scientifically proven, or people who just don't know what they're talking about pushing their philosophy - or the worst, people who tell others how to live their lives when they can't even live their own.
Reminds me of a song line, "He can't even run his own life; I'll be damned if he'll run mine!"
But the bottom line is, whenever you read anything, you get out of it what you need, take with it what you can use, and leave the parts that don't help.
Self-help books can help someone who is willing to take what they offer and put them into use in their own lives.
But I have seen some quack self-help books though. Self-published books by people with no credentials, books by people who have off the wall theories about things that aren't scientifically proven, or people who just don't know what they're talking about pushing their philosophy - or the worst, people who tell others how to live their lives when they can't even live their own.
Reminds me of a song line, "He can't even run his own life; I'll be damned if he'll run mine!"
But the bottom line is, whenever you read anything, you get out of it what you need, take with it what you can use, and leave the parts that don't help.
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• I especially like your last line. Take what you want and leave the rest. Thanks
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October 07, 2009 11:37 PM
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Which ones?
I've read a few, just out of curiosity, and most of them seemed flakey.
I got more insight into how my brain works by just picking up a copy of Kolb and Wishaw's text of human neuropsychology and reading that.
So maybe you need to qualify your question with somethng more specific, like, what kind, or what class of self-help books.
I knew a man-hating woman once who devoured books and tapes by Suzy Orman because she thought Suzy would teach her, as a woman, how to stop men from exploiting her and for her to exploit men instead, and she got upset when I said, "Yeah, but Suzy's not making her money from guys, is she?"
I should have made sure she was still on her meds before popping out that little observation.
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I've read a few, just out of curiosity, and most of them seemed flakey.
I got more insight into how my brain works by just picking up a copy of Kolb and Wishaw's text of human neuropsychology and reading that.
So maybe you need to qualify your question with somethng more specific, like, what kind, or what class of self-help books.
I knew a man-hating woman once who devoured books and tapes by Suzy Orman because she thought Suzy would teach her, as a woman, how to stop men from exploiting her and for her to exploit men instead, and she got upset when I said, "Yeah, but Suzy's not making her money from guys, is she?"
I should have made sure she was still on her meds before popping out that little observation.
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October 08, 2009 12:36 AM
I am curious about self help books in general. I don't have a particular one in mind. I have also read a few over the years. Most did seem flakey. However, even those that seemed right on just collected dust after a few weeks. I was wondering if other people's experience was similar.
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October 07, 2009 11:57 PM
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I believe that they do not help. Mostly because they suggest work on the part of the help seeker and this does not get done. People look for magic quick fixes and completing the "assignments" that are included in most self help books does not amount to a magic fix. Less than halfway through self help books, they are set aside to collect dust on the nightstand, and as we all know osmosis does not work.
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October 08, 2009 12:43 AM
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I find that they don't help either. If anything it made me feel worse...Some of them seem to make everything become too overwhelming instead of simplifying how to's...I feel it's easier to learn from those who've had similar struggles out of friends and family then some stranger who wrote some words in a book. It's easier when you are already connected to a person who knows you to a certain extent and vice versa instead of not being able to have that other person to respond to your sudden questions and concerns. If that makes sense..:)
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October 08, 2009 12:46 AM
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As with any form of education, self help books are only as valuable as you allow them to be.
Personally, I'm not a huge fan of self help books. That being said, I've read a few of them. What I've found is that I take bits, pieces and quotes away but haven't integrated the core message into my day-to-day life as propositioned.
The self help books that I've read feel sensational. They get me excited about something in a very shallow sense but when confronted with a problem, I rarely apply the lessons taught.
This is entirely subjective and based on the books that I've read. I'm somewhat pessimistic when I read and almost constantly question motive as I flip pages.
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Personally, I'm not a huge fan of self help books. That being said, I've read a few of them. What I've found is that I take bits, pieces and quotes away but haven't integrated the core message into my day-to-day life as propositioned.
The self help books that I've read feel sensational. They get me excited about something in a very shallow sense but when confronted with a problem, I rarely apply the lessons taught.
This is entirely subjective and based on the books that I've read. I'm somewhat pessimistic when I read and almost constantly question motive as I flip pages.
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October 08, 2009 03:36 AM
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Yes, self help books are an empowering way to shift your thoughts and perspective towards releasing belief systems that stunt your growth or progress. Some excellent resources are books by metaphysical authors such as Louise Hay's "You Can Heal Your Life" and Dr. Wayne Dyer's series of self-help material. Any personal growth tools you can use to take positive action to change what is no longer working for you are essential towards creating your best life. It's all about being spiritually and mentally ready to facilitate the changes going on within oneself. The books may nurture an idea that sparks the passion needed to take that leap of faith and open the road to new beginnings.
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October 08, 2009 01:12 PM
The Secret(movie), Attraction Factor(book), I'd Rather Be Rich(book) Helpful Answer? (0)
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It depends on the individual to be helped by self help books. Sometimes it will just help you to get out of the blue feelings of a day. Anyway, all self help authors are making money for sure. So their methods are working for them. Now, follow only one method, which makes you feel good. Then following the methods that suggests, probably will make you somewhere. I am doing experiment with one book right now. It will take some time to finish the book and see the results.
So if you want to follow the methods in one particular book, go for it. Make sure you follow it completely.
If you don't like self help books, don't bother to read one.
I read so many books, and they all suggest to have positive attitude.
I will tell you, there is no quick way to get rich. Even though Mr. Fire says you can have a luxury car tomorrow, you will have to pay for it in the end. He didn't said you don't have to pay. Keep that in mind, before putting the credit card number to register for his course.
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So if you want to follow the methods in one particular book, go for it. Make sure you follow it completely.
If you don't like self help books, don't bother to read one.
I read so many books, and they all suggest to have positive attitude.
I will tell you, there is no quick way to get rich. Even though Mr. Fire says you can have a luxury car tomorrow, you will have to pay for it in the end. He didn't said you don't have to pay. Keep that in mind, before putting the credit card number to register for his course.
The Secret(movie), Attraction Factor(book), I'd Rather Be Rich(book) Helpful Answer?
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October 08, 2009 10:26 PM
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Haven't we been here before? :)
This is what I said last time:
-- Quote
Some selp help books are helpful to some people. The problem is finding ones that would be helpful to you in the areas that matter to you.
There's two big problems...
a) It's hard to tell baloney from expert well-grounded advice.
b) Reading stuff, even if the content is 100% on the nail, is often insufficient to get a person to actually change their behavior or attitudes.
However some books that I've found at least a bit helpful at various times...
Stephen Covey - The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
A few ideas have stayed with me, esp his Four Quadrants method of prioritising things to do, which I used to use for a few years.
Dave Allen - Getting Things Done
Again, useful for various practical tips on organising oneself and being productive. For example, the way he defined the concept of the "Next Action".
Deborah Tannen - That's Not What I Meant
She's written a few books on communication styles, esp differences between men and women. It's quite intiguing esp if you talk over the ideas with your partner! Some great moments of: "OMG, so that's what you meant when you said yadda, I never realised!"
But bottom-line books alone are pretty ineffective compared to life experiences or the best experiental training courses. Of course those cost thousands of dollars, and books are quite cheap by comparison, so we shouldn't complain too much!
--/Quote
http://www.mahalo.com/answers/self-help-books/are-self-help-book-s-helpful
Helpful Answer?
This is what I said last time:
-- Quote
Some selp help books are helpful to some people. The problem is finding ones that would be helpful to you in the areas that matter to you.
There's two big problems...
a) It's hard to tell baloney from expert well-grounded advice.
b) Reading stuff, even if the content is 100% on the nail, is often insufficient to get a person to actually change their behavior or attitudes.
However some books that I've found at least a bit helpful at various times...
Stephen Covey - The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
A few ideas have stayed with me, esp his Four Quadrants method of prioritising things to do, which I used to use for a few years.
Dave Allen - Getting Things Done
Again, useful for various practical tips on organising oneself and being productive. For example, the way he defined the concept of the "Next Action".
Deborah Tannen - That's Not What I Meant
She's written a few books on communication styles, esp differences between men and women. It's quite intiguing esp if you talk over the ideas with your partner! Some great moments of: "OMG, so that's what you meant when you said yadda, I never realised!"
But bottom-line books alone are pretty ineffective compared to life experiences or the best experiental training courses. Of course those cost thousands of dollars, and books are quite cheap by comparison, so we shouldn't complain too much!
--/Quote
http://www.mahalo.com/answers/self-help-books/are-self-help-book-s-helpful
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October 08, 2009 11:41 PM
You are right of course. I did ask this question on Mahalo. I asked it again here on ConundrumLand because I thought it would generate a lively discussion and let people share about their personal experiences. This being a more opinion based forum not requiring facts and resources. I apologize if this has upset you.
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