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Tufts University has banned sexual activity in a dorm room while a roommate is present. Do you agree with the policy?
The Associated Press reported today that Tufts University "has a new policy banning sexual activity while a roommate is in the same room." Do you think the University has gone to far in regulating students' behavior? or Do you feel like this is an issue to be worked out between roommates?
Link to article: http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5hSqdYZsBgZ2h2r8aW2qB2f_rjDrwD9B18RJG0
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Link to article: http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5hSqdYZsBgZ2h2r8aW2qB2f_rjDrwD9B18RJG0
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September 30, 2009 07:13 AM
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I'm thinking that this rule probably came about due to complaints about this very situation. The article said, "...the school issued the new rule after a dozen or so complaints in the past three years."
If it were me, the roomate? I'd be a little upset if I'm trying to study or do my homework or sleep and my roomate is having sex with someone in the same room as me. There seems little propriety to that.
My daughter is college-aged, and she is a virgin and I think she would be somewhat horrified if someone did this in front of her, as she still has the romantic notion that sex is equivalent to making love, and you wouldn't do that with a third party in the room--that makes it less special.
I think etiquette says this is just a bad thing to do, all the way around, but then, college students never have been known for making the best decisions.
Do I think there should be a rule about it though, with punitive sanctions? No, probably not.
If it were me, the roomate? I'd be a little upset if I'm trying to study or do my homework or sleep and my roomate is having sex with someone in the same room as me. There seems little propriety to that.
My daughter is college-aged, and she is a virgin and I think she would be somewhat horrified if someone did this in front of her, as she still has the romantic notion that sex is equivalent to making love, and you wouldn't do that with a third party in the room--that makes it less special.
I think etiquette says this is just a bad thing to do, all the way around, but then, college students never have been known for making the best decisions.
Do I think there should be a rule about it though, with punitive sanctions? No, probably not.
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September 30, 2009 02:00 AM
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Well, I think it's a sad state of affairs when a school needs to create rooms for common sense things like this...but after reading the article, it appears that the "rule" is really more of a statement to encourage discussion between roommates. There are no penalties or enforcement procedures associated with the "rule". While it may not be the best way to encourage discussion, it may have a beneficial effect.
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September 30, 2009 02:26 AM
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I think it has gone too far. I think this should be worked out between roommates.
Although I believe that sexual activity in a dorm with a roommate is inconsiderate seeing as that roommate has a right to be there, I think that the roommate(not having sex) should step up and say something if they are offended. Also, the school shouldn't interfere with student's sex lives, and they shouldn't have to enforce a policy that doesn't directly affect the school itself. People should learn respect for each other, and learn that if they are offended they should stand up for themselves, and not expect others, especially an institution, to do it for them.
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Although I believe that sexual activity in a dorm with a roommate is inconsiderate seeing as that roommate has a right to be there, I think that the roommate(not having sex) should step up and say something if they are offended. Also, the school shouldn't interfere with student's sex lives, and they shouldn't have to enforce a policy that doesn't directly affect the school itself. People should learn respect for each other, and learn that if they are offended they should stand up for themselves, and not expect others, especially an institution, to do it for them.
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September 30, 2009 02:57 AM
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Yes, totally! This is a completely reasonable thing for the institution to do. It will help raise personal awareness about the situation and any college student who has lived or experienced dorm room sexual activity will agree with it. For those who have experienced such things (and I've inquired with my friends from college), the reaction I'm getting across the board is, "Hell yeah! Can I go to Tufts?!"
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September 30, 2009 03:07 AM
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I assume the rule doesn't apply if the activity is WITH the room mate. To be honest, I'm surprised they haven't created a formalized rule like this sooner. Yes, it's common sense, but it's nice to have it written down for the next time someone doesn't feel like respecting someone else's space.
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September 30, 2009 05:59 AM
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I don't think this is something the university should get involved with, at least not on such an 'official' note. I think the roommates should have a discussion, but let's face it, if your roommate is actually having sex while you are in the room, there is a good chance they will not be very reasonable about refraining. It will likely be an uncomfortable conversation, but one that should be had regardless.
Honestly, it is just poor taste to have sex while your roommate is in the room and in such close quarters, but if alcohol is involved, as it often is, good judgement is not always used. In that case, it might be easier to approach one's roommate. I think if the roommate does not respect your wishes, however, that the resident hall advisor should be notified before involving the higher ups at the university.
It is a tough situation. I actually started a page on it earlier, though I probably gave it an awful heading title: http://www.mahalo.com/tufts-university-dorm-room-sex-etiquette-policy
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Honestly, it is just poor taste to have sex while your roommate is in the room and in such close quarters, but if alcohol is involved, as it often is, good judgement is not always used. In that case, it might be easier to approach one's roommate. I think if the roommate does not respect your wishes, however, that the resident hall advisor should be notified before involving the higher ups at the university.
It is a tough situation. I actually started a page on it earlier, though I probably gave it an awful heading title: http://www.mahalo.com/tufts-university-dorm-room-sex-etiquette-policy
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