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Would you feel differently about your neighbor if you found out they were a sex offender?
Would you change how your family interacts with the neighbor?
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October 25, 2009 01:59 AM
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We had a sex offender in the neighborhood who used to live across the street from the bus stop, and he once exposed himself to the young girls there. Of course, we called the police, and made sure the girls always had someone to walk to the stop with them.
On the other hand, I had a friend whose husband was on the sex offender list. He did something to his brother, and his 14 year old niece got mad about it, and told the police he had molested her. It came out later that she had been sleeping with her 17 year old boyfriend, and thought she was pregnant, and he had threatened to kill her if she told it was him, so she blamed it on her uncle. He almost went to prison, but a smart detective wouldn't give up on the case, and finally got her to confess she lied.
There are also cases where 18 year old boys are arrested by angry parents for consentual sex with 15 and 16 year old girls, and they are put on the sex offender list for the rest of their lives.
Not everyone on the sex offender list did anything really bad to get there, and don't belong there. I know how it is to be on a list for nothing. My 14 year old son became out of control and kept running away. Social Services finally took him, but they couldn't keep him unless they charged me with neglect. So I was on the child abuser list for 7 years, when I never abused my son.
On the other hand, I had a friend whose husband was on the sex offender list. He did something to his brother, and his 14 year old niece got mad about it, and told the police he had molested her. It came out later that she had been sleeping with her 17 year old boyfriend, and thought she was pregnant, and he had threatened to kill her if she told it was him, so she blamed it on her uncle. He almost went to prison, but a smart detective wouldn't give up on the case, and finally got her to confess she lied.
There are also cases where 18 year old boys are arrested by angry parents for consentual sex with 15 and 16 year old girls, and they are put on the sex offender list for the rest of their lives.
Not everyone on the sex offender list did anything really bad to get there, and don't belong there. I know how it is to be on a list for nothing. My 14 year old son became out of control and kept running away. Social Services finally took him, but they couldn't keep him unless they charged me with neglect. So I was on the child abuser list for 7 years, when I never abused my son.
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• Thanks for your story...true that not all sex offenders or people on "lists" are threats.
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October 25, 2009 01:43 AM
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It depends on his level of offense. If he is only level one, I would take precautions to make sure my kids were never alone in the house. I would also get to know the neighbor just well enough to know whether or not he/she was a threat. If they were a threat or something in my gut told me to be weary, I would make sure my house was wired with a security system and keep a friendly, but concerned eye on my neighbor's comings and goings. I wouldn't let the neighbor completely ruin or interrupt my life by constantly being distracted by him/her but I would simply keep it in the back of my mind and the police on speed dial.
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October 25, 2009 02:51 AM
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It solely depends on what exactly the charge against the person it. Some people are register sex offenders because they dated a 16 year old, when they was 18 years old. I once read a story about a guy who was a register sex offender because of this. He later married the girl. You have to look beyond the term. In some places a register sex offender is simply someone arrested for indecent exposure, perhaps an innocent drunken moment. Then again there are some who have committed horrible crimes.
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October 25, 2009 11:40 PM
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Registered? Accused? Or convicted?
99% of people do or have experienced acts that are punishable by law under the category of sex offender but only a few are exposed, investigated, caught or convicted.
Does your opinion only change if they are being monitored by authorities? That seems to be a good thing.
I'd be more worried about the people that haven't been caught if I was to worry at all.
But a violent or repeat offender is worth being cautious around whether they've been caught or not. So if that was the case and I had potential victims living with me that'd be different.
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99% of people do or have experienced acts that are punishable by law under the category of sex offender but only a few are exposed, investigated, caught or convicted.
Does your opinion only change if they are being monitored by authorities? That seems to be a good thing.
I'd be more worried about the people that haven't been caught if I was to worry at all.
But a violent or repeat offender is worth being cautious around whether they've been caught or not. So if that was the case and I had potential victims living with me that'd be different.
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October 26, 2009 12:49 AM
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I most definitely would feel differently knowing they were a sex offender.
I would do my research to find out what exactly they were accused of and/or convicted of. It is better to be fully aware so I would know what possible danger may be in our midst or if the case was one that I did not have to be quite as concerned about.
They may have served their time, gone through therapy, counseling or whatever methods of dealing with it there are, but the doubt is always there if it was a true and justified accusation or conviction.
I certainly would want to be able to protect my children, warn them and be able to keep an eye out in case the neighbor was still prone to repeating the acts that gave him or her the title of sex offender.
My own safety as a woman is an issue too. We as women always have to be aware of our surroundings, as sad as that is and if there is a sex offender nearby, I want to know.
Unfortunately there are sex offenders across the world. So unless we can each create our own rules and countries we have to learn how to deal with the situation in the safest way possible.
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I would do my research to find out what exactly they were accused of and/or convicted of. It is better to be fully aware so I would know what possible danger may be in our midst or if the case was one that I did not have to be quite as concerned about.
They may have served their time, gone through therapy, counseling or whatever methods of dealing with it there are, but the doubt is always there if it was a true and justified accusation or conviction.
I certainly would want to be able to protect my children, warn them and be able to keep an eye out in case the neighbor was still prone to repeating the acts that gave him or her the title of sex offender.
My own safety as a woman is an issue too. We as women always have to be aware of our surroundings, as sad as that is and if there is a sex offender nearby, I want to know.
Unfortunately there are sex offenders across the world. So unless we can each create our own rules and countries we have to learn how to deal with the situation in the safest way possible.
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