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If your partner was classed by a psychiatrist as clinically dangerous and it's a matter of time before they harm you. Would you leave them?

I just watched a Law and Order Criminal Intent episode where the partner never left and was murdered in a rage.
Do you think you could stay if your partner was classed as clinically dangerous?
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jillbeth
jillbeth
Marked as Best! October 12, 2009 11:47 AM
Unfortunately, it's almost impossible to get help for someone who is mentally ill and refuses treatment. I have a family member who has a mental illness, but he has never become violent toward others although he has shown tendencies to harm himself. His medications keep him well and I make sure that he takes them as prescribed so it's been while since I've had to deal with a psychosis.

It is possible, if a mentally ill person even threatens to do himself or others harm, even if he hasn't actually assaulted anyone, to have him picked up by law enforcement officers and delivered to a mental health facility for a mandataory three-day evaluation. Then the facility can either retain him if they feel he's dangerous, or turn him loose if they feel he's not really a threat.

So now to answer your question, if I were unable to convince a potentially violent person to get help, or if he were evaluated and turned loose again, and I still was in fear of him, yes, I would do whatever it took to keep myself safe, even if that meant moving out of my own home. I'm not one of those women who are willing to put up with a bunch of crap from a guy just "because I love him." Women like that put themselves and their children in danger and I never understood that attitude. I guess some women think even a dangerous man is better than no man at all, or that they deserve the abuse. Too bad for them.
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philipy
philipy
October 11, 2009 06:25 PM
Well... you know what they say: love is blind. Maybe not so much blind, but so powerful that it trumps all other considerations. There are plenty of people that stay with alcoholic or abusive partners a long way beyond what might seem reasonable to third parties. Just as people will go to great lengths for their children or parents, when someone who was unrelated to them might see them as completely undeserving of all that support.

In short... who knows what I'd actually do in that situation? What people imagine they'd do and what they actually do often turn out to be very different.

Overall, for most people. me included, there are certainly things that are worth risking your life for, and the well-being of your partner and kids would be probably be high on that list.
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psionandy
psionandy
October 11, 2009 08:20 PM
If it ever came down to that level, I'd hope that that my partner was somewhere where they could get the medical help that they need. I really don't think that I'd be able to provide that in a home environment. It would break my heart but I don't think that we could stay together pretending everything was normal
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