I'd never change going to private college, doing badly, and then dropping out. It was a horrible situation all around. My health suffered, physical and mental; it made the rest of my school career a bit of a stitched-together crapshoot; it wasted over $20,000 of my parents' money (and probably more, since I had no conception of budgeting). I could go on and on about how bad this was.

But I feel I'm a more mature person for it. I had experiences and learned things (even though my grades didn't reflect it) that I wouldn't have otherwise. I can trace a lot of my hobbies back to that time. And more importantly, I'm doing a lot better in college now that I know what not to do. A lot of people I know weren't forced to confront so starkly what being immature could do.

My family went through hard time is the 1970's when Dad lost several jobs due to the recession. We didn't have much money and used food stamps for awhile. We were never very hungry, but we ate the same things a lot (think chicken neck soup). I saw my Dad try everything he could to get a job and support our family. Friends and relatives helped us out. Eventually the recession ended and Dad got a long lasting job. We survived tough times with the help of our friends and family, and we got back on our feet because Dad never gave up, and Mom never gave up on Dad.

Now I face similar tough times in my own life, with loss of job. Because of the example of earlier tough times and how to get through them, I know how people get through tough times. You keep on trying, and you depend on friends and family to help, if you have to do so. Also, when your friends and family need help, you offer it, That's how we work together and get through hard times.

Another lesson I learned was not to be too cocky if you are doing well, things can change with one word from your boss.

I wouldn't change my childhood hard times for anything.

Earlier this year, My mom got sick and my father almost got jailed in a lot of debt. My sister was in a deep depression and my little brother was strayed in his path in life. We suffered, and worse we just migrated into a new place and the people who we thought who were our friends....actually just made us a "hot topic" on their monthly gossip and dinner sessions. We of course at first didn't noticed, but they were always so nosy on our lives and seem to enjoy breaking us apart.

But through this, through ALL of this. I was pulled out of my "comfort" zone as an ordinary teenage girl, and learned alot from life. I also gained new friends, lost friends, but most of all now know who I can trust on.

I learned that THOSE WHO MIND, DO NOT MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER, DO NOT MIND. I have always been a "doormat" and always thought of what other people think of me. Now that I have been set free of that, I'm very happy for myself. I now know how to stand my ground. :)

I almost gave up somewhere in the middle of all our suffering..in our family financially, social..etc. But, I'm glad I didn't. Another great lesson i've learned is "Another mistake is another lesson learned". I always felt bad if I've done something wrong and sulk for days, but the new "me" now has learned that every mistake I will make will make a stronger and better me. :)

When I was sixteen, my first love broke up with me and totally crushed my heart. In my teenaged mind, I had imagined us living happily ever after. We had been dating for a year and I didn't see this coming. In my grief, I cried myself to sleep for many, many weeks. For over a year after I began dating again, I couldn't (didn't want to?) get attached to another boy. However, after the smoke cleared, I realized that he had been using me financially (even though all I had was meager babysitting money), emotionally and sexually. The next time around with a serious love, it was me doing the heart-breaking.

As extremely painful as that was, now I wonder if we should all have our heart broken at some time in our life in order to fully appreciate a lasting love when it presents itself.

I also think the experience helped me to help my own teenage daughter when her heart was ripped in two by a stinking loser.