If you are not serious about your vows, don't get married. Take your vows seriously. You promise, in front of God and each other and the minister, all of your family and friends, to love her and only her, to cherish her not only ABOVE others, but cherish ONLY her, INSTEAD of all others, forsaking all others. Help her, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live, then by God don't be taking phone numbers from other women. Don't be fostering "friendships" that she knows noting about, or "confidences" that don't include her. Here's an idea for an "open" marriage, don't keep secrets from her. You promise to love her. Love means no yelling, no hitting, no "silent treatment", no cruelty, and it means you are kind and considerate and helpful. Dog-gone it you knuckleheads, it means you're a team of only two, and when things get hard, as they will, you dig in together, back to back and you FIGHT, not against each other, but together, against all the heartache and stress and struggles that this life will surely send your way. Never stop holding each other, and never stop reminding each other who is number one in your life. Together, you will somehow survive all the ugliness and temptation this world has in store for you.

But you'll never do it if you aren't serious about your vows. Have them printed out and posted on your mirror or on your refrigerator or on your kitchen wall, keep them in front of you and by God live by them every day.

If you are not serious about your vows, don't get married. If you aren't done being single, if you don't want to be a couple with all your heart, don't you be entering into vows you are not serious about.