Try just being honest: "I really want to be there for you, but hospitals make me extremely uncomfortable. If I went along, I'm afraid that instead of supporting you, I would be distracting you with my own discomfort. Can I drive you there, pick you back up, and maybe take you for coffee? I would love to spend time with you afterwards so you can unload a little."

?Well, to tell you the truth I don't think you should try to get out of it.

Sorry, that's the way it goes. I think you used the word friend... yes?

What if it were your friend who was in the hospital? Or your mother? Or your child? Would you go to see them? If so, your honest answer becomes a little more troublesome. You would have to honestly say that your friendship for him and his mother is not as strong as your dislike of hospitals.

If your hatred of hospitals is so strong that you are physically unable to bring yourself to enter, you may seriously want to consider seeking help from mental health professionals, because there may very possibly come a time when you want to enter a hospital more than anything in the world.

My father died in a hospital two years ago today. He spent a week there before he died and we were able to visit several times during that week. How awful and how sad if I had stood outside the building and said "I can't go in because I hate hospitals".

I took my mother to see dad every day, and after he passed, I drove mom to the cemetery, the funeral home, and the church to make all the arrangements. I didn't think I could do it, and I didn't want to do it, but there was no one else but me. Somehow I got through it. I found I had more strength than I imagined. Perhaps you also have that strength. Perhaps your friend's concern over his mother, and his need to have you there, is more important than your hatred of hospitals. If you are somehow able to overcome this hatred, you will be a better and stronger person, and you will have one more reason to like yourself.

I don't know anyone who likes hospitals, nor do I know anyone who likes funeral homes. I have been in this situation before and if someone asks me to do something like go to a hospital, they are asking me to go because they need MY support, not that of another friend or relative. It's at that moment, I realize this is not about me, it's about them and their needs. Unless you are going to have a full on panic attack and end up being treated as a patient instead of a visitor, I would suggest you be strong for your friend and his mom.

I hope she recovers soon and is able to return home.

Don't be selfish, this is about your friend, not you. :P