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If you found out that your spouse had sex with someone else could you forgive them?

It wasn't an affair it was sex one time with some random person when your relationship was going through a tough phase. Could you forgive them?
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amybrowne2
amybrowne2
Marked as Best! December 18, 2009 01:39 PM
Well I thought I had forgiven my ex husband for cheating but many friends have told me that it does not seem that way. I cannot excuse his behavior that hurt when he cheated but I no longer wish him harm. i will never forget the feelings within me that his affair caused and that keeps me away from him.

I felt dumb, fat, ugly etc when I released he was having the affair I felt awful, i realize I made myself feel like that but I know those feeling were directly related to his choice to have an affair.
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vicgoodwin...
vicgoodwin...
December 16, 2009 05:09 PM
Being the person I am, I would attempt to forgive him. I now it would be hard to get past the hurt of the situation, but I would give it my all.
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marisaupa
marisaupa
December 16, 2009 08:31 PM
To answer this question with a firm yes or no would be dishonest. Under the circumstances that you describe I imagine that I would be inclined to forgive him; but, unless I was actually living through that situation I do not know if the pain of the betrayal would allow me to react rationally.

I hope that my life's experience does not bring about a situation where I would discover the answer to your question.
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allenatkin...
allenatkin...
December 16, 2009 09:22 PM
I would like to believe that i would hold no ill feelings for something that happened when we were not together. On the other hand if we were still living together and going through a rough patch and my mate decided to find comfort with someone else i would have trouble. I think i would be hurt and have trouble in that respect. It would be hard to forgive when i have trouble forgetting.The thought of someone who was so close to me who could not come and let me know that this going to happen leaves me to believe that had we not resolved our issues.
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nicolekkat
nicolekkat
December 17, 2009 12:54 AM
It really depended on the case. There is no straight answer to that question. There would be mulitple questions that would play a part in my descion. Did he intend on hurting me. Did he think he would never get caught? Does he honesly regret doing this to me? Will he ever do this again? If you can find the answers to these questions. Then it will be an easier descion. I try to think that all things can be forgiven. But sometimes people's actions hurt us so bad that we cannot forgive them.
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