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How do you react to a long-time friend who went from rags to riches and changed entirely?
If you knew the girl for over a decade including the time when she was not doing so well financially but had always been quite fond of her, how to do you respond to her now after she's obtained a high-earning position and uses every chance to let others know that mediocre is just not good enough for her anymore? Should money ever change a person completely and allow the person to forget where they came from (even though they likely worked hard for their status)?
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October 19, 2009 01:34 PM
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If the money has gone to her head in such a major way, you may have to nicely tell her to get in touch with you when she comes down to earth and wants a friendship that has been a long-time one where you can be a true friend to her and not just a "friend" now that she has come into money.
If "mediocre isn't good enough", does that mean that she wants to go to dining and shopping places that are beyond your means? If so, you have to politely refuse and explain that it is because those places are out of your budget range. If she finds herself with no one to go places with her, perhaps she will realize the fallacy of her ways.
If she is just calling you to brag about her wealth, you can cut the conversations short ("Someone is at the door" or "Another phone call is coming in and I have to hang up" or "I have to leave for an appointment", etc.). You need not waste your valuable time listening to her because she is only looking for a "sounding board".
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If "mediocre isn't good enough", does that mean that she wants to go to dining and shopping places that are beyond your means? If so, you have to politely refuse and explain that it is because those places are out of your budget range. If she finds herself with no one to go places with her, perhaps she will realize the fallacy of her ways.
If she is just calling you to brag about her wealth, you can cut the conversations short ("Someone is at the door" or "Another phone call is coming in and I have to hang up" or "I have to leave for an appointment", etc.). You need not waste your valuable time listening to her because she is only looking for a "sounding board".
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October 19, 2009 12:32 PM
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I would tell them that "I was your friend when you were poor" and not to treat me badly now. What goes up can come down quickly. If they lose their position they may be looking for their old friends who will no longer be there if treated badly.
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October 19, 2009 07:45 PM
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I'm not sure I understand what you mean when you say that mediocre isn't good enough for her anymore. There are lots of relatively low-income people who still make the effort to drive nice cars and live in spotless condos. Do you mean that she's splurging on luxury goods and putting down the things that you have? It sounds like she used to have a rather uncomfortable life and is now just excited about being free from it. I think the best way to react may be simply to be happy for her; especially since you may one day find yourself in the same position.
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October 20, 2009 06:12 AM
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Having money shouldn't change a person, but it often does. Once a person achieves a certain financial status, forgetting where they came from and changing into a shallower, more self-centered individual can happen over the course of time.
If I knew a girl who had suddenly come into a lot of money, I would mooch off of her and use the friendship to my advantage as much as possible before the girl blew me off and the friendship fell apart.
Certain types of people can't be expected to associate with those they view as being beneath them or belonging to a lower social class than they perceive themselves to be a part of.
At least not for very long.
-- Even if their own origins are as humble as anyone else's.
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If I knew a girl who had suddenly come into a lot of money, I would mooch off of her and use the friendship to my advantage as much as possible before the girl blew me off and the friendship fell apart.
Certain types of people can't be expected to associate with those they view as being beneath them or belonging to a lower social class than they perceive themselves to be a part of.
At least not for very long.
-- Even if their own origins are as humble as anyone else's.
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