Awe, that's so tough.

5 years old is a tough age too. I think at that age, I may just buy another one. Many fish look similar, and you could probably pull it off.

If he was any older, I'd have to say to tell him. Even 5 is kinda on the teetering edge, depending on how much the child spent time, watched the fish etc. You would hate to do that only to realize he knows his fish well enough.

I had some very hardcore talks with my kids about when we've had a pet die. They cry and it's hard. My little one still brings up our Jack cat, and he died 2 years ago. It doesn't get any easier no matter how hard the age. Right now I have a 13 year old "war torn' cat who was a rescue, but lost half his muscles in his mouth due to a coyote fight, has had numerous surgeries, we have to give him cortisone shots because of ulcers in his mouth. He's had many teeth removed. I know his days are numbered, and it breaks my heart. I'd probably have to take bereavement days off work when he goes, I'm that attached to him. I also explain to my kids (8 an 12) that smoke's time is coming up and we all need to be prepared. It makes them sad to talk about it, but they will know it is coming when it happens, and sadly I think it's gonna be pretty soon :(

Aww... that's really sad. :(

But I think you should just explain it to him. It's time for him to know some things in life. Yes I know he's young and delicate to these topics but it will help him.

Tell him that sometimes, not all things will be there always. But somewhere, his little fish is happy. Maybe there's a heaven for pets. :) Although he's gone now, he feels happy cause he get to have a wonderful owner like you.

Then, open up the topic of getting another fish if he wants to. Your little fish will be happy if you can make another fish happy too. :) If you want, we can get another pet for you.

I know the explanation is simple. But there's the thought right? I think this will work. This often works for me back then when my little chicken died way back when I was young.

This would depend entirely on the maturity level of the child. At the age of 5, some children already display more developed levels of handling emotional issues than others. If the child demonstrates such maturity, it is perhaps best to let them know how his friend fish did in fact die and even though he will never see him again, in a way , he is always with him due to all the happy memories they had together.

If however, the child does not possess that level of emotional maturity, then a little white lie, either by substituting another fish, or stating that the fish went on vacation, or to fish college might be more appropriate.

Basically, if the child is emotionally ready, it presents itself as an opportunity to present the concept of loss, if not, don't make the child anguish needlessly either.

I would try to explain to my 5-year old what really happened to the fish to the level of his maturity and age. Although it is tough but I will do my best to explain and tell him the truth. He may be too young to understand but children cannot be underestimated. They have a mind like a sponge.

I have to explain that if a fish like his pet is ill or getting old it is going to die. That is one of the realities in life that he has to understand but the words should be carefully chosen so that he won't fear and felt threatened. I will also explain to him the cycle of fish and later on the cycle of life. That in every death there is also life that is emerging.

This question reminds me of a story I heard recently.

A little boy was running on the beach just ahead of his father. He came upon a dead seagull.
"Daddy, Daddy, hurry come here!" he cried.
His Dad saw the frightened look on his little boy's face as he stood. near the bird.
"Well, son," the father explained "he has gone to heaven to be with God."
The little boy replied, " So why did God throw him back?"

Sometimes we think we can explain to our children things they are really not ready to conceive. Maybe it's because we forget how to think like a child. Maybe it's because we want to console them and protect them. Whatever the reason, it's probably best to keep the answer to their questions simple. As they mature so will their understanding.
I would wait for your little one to ask for another fish. Let it be their decision, a step to maturity.

I think kids need to be told the truth about death and other facts of life, as much as their age will allow them to understand. Kids are pretty smart, they usually know when we're not being up-front with them. We need to give them straight answers, although not necessarily every detail, so we gain their trust.

Kids who learn to deal with stress and grief at a young age are usually better at handling stressful situations when they're older. We want to protect our kids and keep them from hurting, but we aren't doing them any real favors in the long run.

I would never ever lie to the kid or anybody else. And even at that age, it doesn't hurt for them to start getting an understanding of life and death. My kids pet bunny died. It was tragic, a big deal to them, but they learned to deal with it and now they can handle that kind of thing much better.

It depends on the maturity level of your child. Some children will understand the concept of death by the age of 5. However, many children will not until they are much older - usually about 8 or 9.

Most preschool children see death as a reversible condition. They have been exposed to death; be in on television, a dead animal on the side of the road, etc, but they don't fully understand the true extent of what death means. Explaining it before they are able to understand is not only pointless, but also very confusing.

Some experts believe that addressing the issue of death head on will cause psychological damage that your child is unable to deal with safely. For example, were you to tell your child the following:
"Every living thing - your fish, your dog, your grandmother, mommy and daddy and even you - will die someday. When we die we sleep forever. We never, ever wake up. We never see anyone else again and the people who have not died yet will not see us again..."
your child may not be able to handle the concept of death maturely.

If you child develops an overwhelming fear of death you are setting him or her up for a slew of psychological problems. They may even attempt to face their own fears by placing their life in danger repeatedly.

Unless you are certain your child understands death or is capable of understanding, you should never give them the full story. It may seem like lying, but a parent sometimes does this as a form of protection.

Normal thought on dying for a child within this age range:

2-6 Years Old:

* Family is center of child’s world
* Confident family will care for her needs
* Plays grown-ups, imitates adults.
* Functions on a day-to-day basis.
* No understanding of time or death
* Cannot imagine life without mum or dad
* Picks up on nonverbal communication.
* Thinks dead people continue to do things (eat, drink, go to the bathroom), but only in the sky.
* Thinks if you walk on the grave the person feels it.
* Magical thinking
* you wish it, it happens (bring the dead back or wishing someone was dead)
* Death brings confusion, guilt thought someone dead
* Tendency to connect things which are not related.