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October 16, 2009 05:44 PM
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The simple answer is "better safe than sorry", but it's never that simple. Reporting someone for child abuse is a serious allegation that can stay with someone for a long time. If it's physical cruelty you suspect, there has to be a reason you suspect it. Are there bruises, or have you heard the child threatened? Sometimes, neighbors hear what's going on in a house close by, and know that something is happening without ever seeing evidence of it.
Does the child seem afraid of their parent? Is the child malnourished? You will have to put together everything you've seen or heard, and make your case to social services before you report them.
There is also the fact that even if you report what you have seen and heard anonymously, it doesn't stay anonymous. For example, social service has to disclose what their reason is for investigating, and they may put something like "next door neighbor heard child being beaten" or something to that effect. If the neighbor is a violent person, they may enact retribution on you.
If the child is of school age, you can ask the school to investigate. They will call the child in and talk to them. These counselors are trained to know if a child is being abused and lying about it. They will have a legal responsibility to report it to the authorities if they suspect any sort of abuse or neglect, and you can be identified only as "a concerned parent".
If the child is not of school age, when you report it, make sure you don't call from your own phone, and don't tell them anything that would identify you to the neighbor. You can be as vague as you want. Social Services is required by law to investigate all reports of abuse or neglect within 24 hours. Be specific enough to give them something to look for, but not enough to identify you as the caller.
I hope this helps. If the neighbor who reported it had been more persistent in the Jaycee Dugard case, maybe she would have been home before she was forced to have two children and be held a prisoner for 18 years. We all have a moral obligation to protect children.
Does the child seem afraid of their parent? Is the child malnourished? You will have to put together everything you've seen or heard, and make your case to social services before you report them.
There is also the fact that even if you report what you have seen and heard anonymously, it doesn't stay anonymous. For example, social service has to disclose what their reason is for investigating, and they may put something like "next door neighbor heard child being beaten" or something to that effect. If the neighbor is a violent person, they may enact retribution on you.
If the child is of school age, you can ask the school to investigate. They will call the child in and talk to them. These counselors are trained to know if a child is being abused and lying about it. They will have a legal responsibility to report it to the authorities if they suspect any sort of abuse or neglect, and you can be identified only as "a concerned parent".
If the child is not of school age, when you report it, make sure you don't call from your own phone, and don't tell them anything that would identify you to the neighbor. You can be as vague as you want. Social Services is required by law to investigate all reports of abuse or neglect within 24 hours. Be specific enough to give them something to look for, but not enough to identify you as the caller.
I hope this helps. If the neighbor who reported it had been more persistent in the Jaycee Dugard case, maybe she would have been home before she was forced to have two children and be held a prisoner for 18 years. We all have a moral obligation to protect children.
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October 16, 2009 08:20 AM
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In some states, if you report such a thing and are wrong, you can get in trouble.
What I'm wondering is, what is making you suspicious in the first place? If the kids have bruises in strange places, act afraid around the parents, or there are other signs that abuse might be going on, then you may have enough evidence to report it. Of course, actually seeing the parent hurt the children would be direct evidence that you could use to report them.
If their house is especially messy, that may be an in for getting the CPS to look at them.
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What I'm wondering is, what is making you suspicious in the first place? If the kids have bruises in strange places, act afraid around the parents, or there are other signs that abuse might be going on, then you may have enough evidence to report it. Of course, actually seeing the parent hurt the children would be direct evidence that you could use to report them.
If their house is especially messy, that may be an in for getting the CPS to look at them.
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October 17, 2009 08:03 PM
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If I had no evidence of my neighbor abusing his children but had my suspicions, I would likely pay very close attention to observable interactions between the neighbors and their child. It would be difficult because all you can really keep an eye on is how the child is handled in public settings or outside the home, unless you are close friends with the neighbors and visit with them frequently. If I did know the neighbors personally, I would watch for signs like bruises on the child or whether the child is constantly dressed in long-sleeved clothing even during warmer months, possibly to conceal bruises. Also, I would watch the behavior of the child and observe whether he/she was fearful of the parent or chose careful wording or actions when in presence of the parent, so as not to upset the parent. If there is constant conflict or abuse going on this their household, then the child will likely be confused as to how to react to their parent in the company of others, since the parent will likely act differently (nicer) towards the child and not lash out at him/her in the presence of another adult. If you don’t know them personally, keep an ear open: Do you typically hear loud yelling or arguing coming from the neighbor house? Do you hear the child crying (especially if he/she is an older child who should not cry out of frustration every day like a toddler or preschooler would). In these early stages of your suspicion when you feel a call to the authorities is not yet warranted, simply pay closer attention and use your best judgment. But also go with your instinct. If it feels like things are not quite right, chances are that you are right. As soon as you feel that your suspicions are confirmed by any particular incident, make sure you call the police for the safety of the child. 
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