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Your child recently had a sleepover at a school friend's house. Two months later he tells you out of the blue that his friends mother ...
... yelled at him while he was spending the day there. How should you react to this statement?
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November 24, 2009 01:27 AM
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First, you let him know that you're concerned, but without condemning anyone before you hear exactly what happened.
Next, I would ask him the details of the situation. Why was she yelling at him? Was she yelling at her child as well? What 'type' of yelling was she doing? "Boys get out of that mud puddle and into the house!" or was it a mean and abusive type of yelling? You might want to even stop to ask if this is the first time it's happened and if she yells at other people often.
The fact that your son is still thinking about this event after two months is an indication the behavior was not appropriate or at the very least not what he is accustomed to in the lines of discipline.
Once you have gathered an opinion based on the information your son gives you there are a few things you might consider doing.
If you feel your son was treated unfairly by this lady, talk to her and get her side of things. If you're still confident she was in the wrong, explain that you handle situations a certain way. Insinuate that you would appreciate her not yelling at your son without attacking her.
From now on, you could hold the sleepovers at your home to avoid your son being at his friend's house again.
Or, you let it go.
It is my opinion that in most situations you have to either fully address them or let it rest.
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Next, I would ask him the details of the situation. Why was she yelling at him? Was she yelling at her child as well? What 'type' of yelling was she doing? "Boys get out of that mud puddle and into the house!" or was it a mean and abusive type of yelling? You might want to even stop to ask if this is the first time it's happened and if she yells at other people often.
The fact that your son is still thinking about this event after two months is an indication the behavior was not appropriate or at the very least not what he is accustomed to in the lines of discipline.
Once you have gathered an opinion based on the information your son gives you there are a few things you might consider doing.
If you feel your son was treated unfairly by this lady, talk to her and get her side of things. If you're still confident she was in the wrong, explain that you handle situations a certain way. Insinuate that you would appreciate her not yelling at your son without attacking her.
From now on, you could hold the sleepovers at your home to avoid your son being at his friend's house again.
Or, you let it go.
It is my opinion that in most situations you have to either fully address them or let it rest.
Personal opinion.
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November 23, 2009 05:44 PM
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I would say "I am sorry to hear that" and let it go.
If someone's parent yelled perhaps there is a good reason. If you are getting the info from your child you know that you are only getting his side of the story.
If he wants to hang out with that friend again, but is worried about that family perhaps you can ask for his mother's phone number and meet her for yourself. It might be nice to have that family over one night, you could get to know the family while your son hangs out with his friend.
Helpful Answer?
If someone's parent yelled perhaps there is a good reason. If you are getting the info from your child you know that you are only getting his side of the story.
If he wants to hang out with that friend again, but is worried about that family perhaps you can ask for his mother's phone number and meet her for yourself. It might be nice to have that family over one night, you could get to know the family while your son hangs out with his friend.
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